Sunday, June 9, 2019

Longer, by Michael Blumlein

★☆☆☆☆ Needs Improvement

(First Contact) The discovery of a possible alien artifact may be just what Cav needs to convince him to rejuvenate again rather than letting himself die. (39,410 words; Time: 2h:11m)

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"Longer," by , published on by .

Mini-Review (click to view--possible spoilers)

Review: 2019.327 (A Word for Authors)

Pro: Cav’s story is about deciding when enough is enough and making an end on your own terms. Gunjita’s is about deciding the same thing, but where Cav is deciding whether to end his life, she’s deciding whether to leave him. The story ultimately resolves both questions.

Con: The writing is really bad, particularly at the start of the story. The text is pretty much one infodump after another, some delivered via as-you-know-Bob dialogue. The dialogue is unnatural in general, and the narration is intrusive. (It's not all like this, though, which is rather strange. It's as though some parts got editorial attention but others did not.)

As far as characterization goes, neither person talks anything like a real scientist; they talk like liberal arts majors who know a little bit of science.

The science is mostly pretty bad, although it has moments when it’s spot on. That doesn’t make up for nonsense like “grav-sensitive drugs” or auras or “supercharged helium.”

And the footnotes do nothing but detract from the story.

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